Pearls Before Swine


Pearl and Purple Pig

    In my room at the Oak Hill Astoria and Atelier last night, the selection for bedtime reading was “Put on Your Pearls, Girls” by Lulu Guinness with the illustrations of Martin Welch. Is is any wonder, then, that Pick of the Litter this morning is a tag which reads Swine Registration? Alone in the parking lot, it didn’t make sense. Paired with where I finished last night, sensational!

   I have returned from my walk. My basket of observations,  empty of herons, entered a new dimension. I had to dodge a few speeding bullets  I mean bicycles, with a variety of buns and buttocks attached to them, some tight buns, a bear claw or two and some buttery, flaky elephant ear pastries.

    Some of the bicycles have mouthpieces or bells, which say “Passing on your left,” or tinkle to let you know they are coming. The latter is preferable, especially if a tickling of the funny bone is also included, the former intrusive. Both are better than being run over or committing the error of trying to step aside, only to find oneself stepping into the way.  Walker, steel thyself!    

   The best was a man who said “Slow and Steady Does It”  as he passed me for the second time. He’s got it. He’s got it. Tortoise before hare. Swirls before pine. Nose to the grindstone, ear to the ground. Walking with bicycles. Tonight, plan to make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear. What’s my line? Someone, please! Direct her! Can you hear me now?


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